`Invented in China, unused by three out of four people worldwide, toilet paper is beloved most of all by Americans. They each use 21,000 rolls a year...' Copied and pasted from the Footnotes section of Colors: The Survival Guides, this chunk of text had me in stitches and I'll probably still be laughing years after the world has officially ended. Going on the assumption that the `21,000 rolls' statistic is correct, and that it has been fact-checked over and over again, this would mean that each American uses more than 57 rolls per day and more than 2 rolls per hour. Even something as serious as the apocalypse isn't going to scare someone so shitless that they would need 57 rolls per day. Fortunately most Americans are wipers rather than washers so I won't touch on the conservation aspect, as all seems to be quiet on the American Waterfront. Still, with so many people having baked beans at the top of their lists of essentail items, it would not be a bad idea at all, to stockpile a few thousand toilet rolls, as the going rate for water would probably be considerably higher than the current rate for oil.